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What to expect from Younger Children

Moving affects children's behavior and emotions. A move represents change, which creates issues for every age. Younger children need more routine, so throughout the move period, aim to keep mealtimes and bedtimes normal. Even as familiar surroundings morph into a mountain of boxes, if breakfast can still start with cereal in a favorite bowl and bedtime is still a ritual of tooth-brushing and story-reading, your kids will cope better than you might expect.

Younger kids in the family are likely to be the most eager members of the move team. You'll see more positive emotions and behavior associated with moving. They also will welcome the chance to assist with the planning, list-making and packing. Let them help by assigning tasks you know they can handle. Moving will trigger anxiety, too, so keep these points in mind:

• Excitement : Give them age-appropriate move tasks to sustain it.
• Curiosity : Share Children's books on moving to give them an idea of what's ahead.
• Anxiety : Reassure with children's books that focus on feelings sparked by a move.
• Sadness : Help them say good-bye and stay in touch with important people
• Disappointment or Anger : Monitor their expectations to keep them in line with really.

Before The Move

• Preschoolers are egocentric. When you show stress at the inevitable snafus with a move, they may think it is something they did. Be mindful of your reactions around them and give them extra reassurance.
• Even in their excitement, school-age children will feel sadness at leaving familiar friends, schools and activities. Help them with concrete ways to make the here-to-there transition. For example, scout out activities in the new community they can get involved in.
• The unknown increases anxiety. Sharing children's picture books about moving is a great way to prepare kids for what's ahead and voice the range of feelings they may have. Check Resources for recommended books to read together.

During the Move

• Saying good-bye to favorite places, people—even to the home itself—is important for this age. Preschoolers may need help in understanding that their same friends and neighbors will not be in the new place. See Ten Tips for parting rituals to plan
• The actual packing-up process may be emotionally trying for preschoolers, as they see furniture and favorite objects disappear into boxes. Aim to pack preschoolers' belongings as late in the move schedule as possible. Reassure them that their belongings are going to the new house.
• Moving is tough on pets. For a child who is attached to the family cat, dog or bird, the pet's discomfort can heighten the child's anxiety. Check Resources for information on moving with pets. Share with your child how the pet may react to lessen unhappy surprises.

After the Move

• Be prepared to re-teach household rules to toddlers in the new home, like not touching what is hot.
• More than ever, monitor your children's moods. Kids can have trouble sleeping in an unfamiliar room after a move. They can be teary or cranky. When children have seemed excited about a move, the change in attitude can be alarming. But it's not unusual. Give them time and be sensitive to their feelings. It won't be long and they'll make exciting surprises and new friends that will have them smiling again!
• Prolonged upset after a move shouldn't be ignored. Unusual problems with schoolwork or peers, or changes in sleeping or eating patterns that don't get better are signs that your child may need extra support in adjusting to the move.

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